Dear Coleen
My partner has been married twice before and I have been married once.
We have a fabulous life in every way and he has made me very happy for the past six years.
We’re both in our fifties and life is amazing, apart from one thing – he won’t marry me!
I’ve asked him why not – usually after a few drinks – and he just says doesn’t see the point and why spoil what we have?
To be honest, it’s not that I’m desperate to get married, it’s more the fact that he doesn’t want to marry me. Why?
I asked him how about an eternity ring, then? And he said he’d been thinking about that and he’ll get one when he’s ready.
This is the only thing we quarrel about. I love him and I know he loves me, so why do I feel like this?
I have had the big white wedding and it didn’t work out,
so why am I craving it now?
Coleen says
I think it’s because you have the romance gene and it’s wonderful to know that your partner wants to commit to you in that way.
But no man likes to feel pressured into a proposal. I know that stopped my hubby Ray from popping the question.
For two years, my entire family asked him every Valentine’s Day, every birthday and every Christmas if he was going to ask me to marry him.
So he didn’t because he’s stubborn and, once they gave up asking, he did. In his own time and when he felt ready.
Look, your relationship sounds fab and you’ve been given another shot at love, which I bet you never thought you’d find.
Maybe he will propose or get you that eternity ring, but is it worth losing your relationship over if he doesn’t, especially if you’re happy in every other way?
You’ve both been married before and it didn’t work out. He’s been down the aisle twice, so I completely understand why he doesn’t want to risk it again.
Why rock the boat when things are perfect now?
More of our agony aunt Coleen Nolan’s advice on your sex, family, health and relationship problems
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